Life Lately: Recovering from a Major Surgery

It’s true that experiences give you the fuel to write. The passion that temporarily took the back seat is reignited by the highest of emotions and I am prodded to recompose my thoughts in solitary moments during my medical leave. Not because I wanted to grab attention or gain sympathy, but I believe that unleashing it is the first step to move forward.

Writing is artistry. Like a painter mixes colors to release his misery, a song writer strums the guitar in melancholy, or a poet scribbles words in loneliness, a writer like me needs to let the words flow naturally to uncover raw emotions.

Last June 12, 2023, I never thought that a simple visit to the emergency room in Makati Medical Center would lead to a major surgery. Join me until the end as I tell you my story. A memorable, historic Independence Day indeed.

The Timelines

Last May 27, 2023 at around 12 am, I started feeling the pain at the left side of my abdomen. I thought it was just because I was not able to eat on time. I took pain meds and it disappeared. The next weekend, June 3 and 4, I felt the same pain but it was mostly on the middle part of my abdomen this time. Again, I took pain meds and it subsided. Then the pain came back again on June 8, 9, and 10. I mainly thought it was gastritis or appendicitis because admittingly, there have been times that I was not able to take my meals on time especially if I am working from home. Also, the pain occurred after my menstruation so I dismissed the idea of it being related to my painful dysmenorrhea. I then decided to go to the hospital for an outpatient check-up on June 10. But I was already squirming in pain inside the cab so I decided to proceed to the emergency room for an immediate treatment.

A few minutes after, the CT scan result showed that there is a 10 cm. mass found in my abdomen and it was suspected to be uterine fibroids or myoma. I was told that it could be the cause of the persistent pain and the only way to alleviate it is by removing it.

I had my blood tests, urine tests, and CT scan. I was surprised that my hemoglobin is only 6 when the normal is around 12 and above. My chronic anemia is still there. I had to repeat the blood test to reconfirm the hemoglobin value and it still showed the same. The doctors ordered for an immediate blood transfusion and advised that I should be admitted in the hospital for monitoring. The oxygen tube was inserted in my nostrils to help support my breathing.

My Health Background

Back in 2015, I was diagnosed with endometriosis, adenomyosis and ovarian cysts. I heavily relied on pain medications during my period cramps as it is really very painful. When I have my period, I am unable to function normally in school or at work, disrupting my regular activities. We were made to believe that painful periods are normal in every woman — but they are not! These were my underlying conditions back then. I was prescribed with hormonal pills by my OB Gynecologist, but I was not able to take them consistently through the years. I was also aware that I have uterine fibroids, but was assured by my doctor that the sizes were too small for an operation during my late twenties.

Because of my heavy bleeding, I also have Anemia. Anemia is a common subsequent effect for women with endometriosis/ adenomyosis. Every time we take the annual physical exam in the office, this has been a common impression. I was taking iron supplements before, but since I did not feel any adverse effects of my anemia like shortness of breathing or headaches, I didn’t maintain them.

The Big Day: June 12, 2023

I had an ultrasound last June 11 to get the accurate sizes of the uterine fibroids, their placements, and everything related to my uterus. I remember being brought to the women’s center in a wheelchair in extreme pain, and I was shivering in coldness while I wore my hospital gown. My family had to go home to get some clothes so I was all alone. The feeling was just so eerie. All I can remember is that I was filled with anxiety and kept praying. My mind was flying to places it shouldn’t be. Thinking of the future, the consequences, my past mistakes, the lessons I should have learned earlier. It was inevitable that I was blaming myself. I questioned myself. I was debating with God. I was crying inside. I was worried not only of the hospital bills, but the possible effect of this surgery to my fertility.

After the ultrasound, I was presented with the option of myomectomy. It means that the myomas will be removed but all other reproductive parts will be preserved for my future pregnancy.

The next morning June 12 at around 6 AM, after thoughtful consideration and prayers, I decided to go with the operation. I never thought that it will be done on the same day at 3 PM. My doctor ordered for an emergency surgery even if it was a holiday. My mom, who just went home in the morning, also got surprised. It was a quick decision I made myself. With the fast transition and short notices, my family was not able to make it before the operation. Good thing, the brother of my dad and his wife came to visit. They were the ones who dropped me off to the operating room together with the rest of the nurses and doctors.

The surgery started at past 3 PM and it lasted for almost five hours! When I woke up, I was so dizzy from the anesthesia and even vomited. My limbs were numb. A bandage was plastered in my belly and a binder was wrapped around my abdomen for support and protection. I was very hungry and thirsty but was not yet allowed to eat or drink. I went up to my room around 12 AM already, feeling tired, restless, and in pain.

Post Surgery: Challenges

The next day, I had a hard time bending, sitting, and walking. Everything was just sorely painful. I was in catheter for two days and wore diaper for a couple of the days. Going to the bathroom was a challenge. Even eating was a challenge as I cannot lift my upper body. I had to recline my bed from time to time to find the lying position where I would be at ease. I was able to walk three days after the surgery.

I was discharged from Makati Med on June 16. The bill exceeded my HMO limit. Although it caused a huge dent on my finances, I just reminded myself that God will provide in other ways in the future. What is important right now is that I am safe and the operation was a success. His grace has always been sufficient.

It took a while for me to move normally at home. The first two weeks, it was challenging to move even in the simplest of activities like getting up from bed, sitting, and standing. I can’t tolerate prolonged walking or standing even until now. I would shift from one position to the other to find my comfy spots. Coughing, laughing, and sneezing caused me discomfort as the muscles of my abdomen are being stretched. Although the outside looks healed, the inside is not. I was also informed by my surgeon that the complete healing may take 6 months to a year. I was prohibited to do strenuous activities to prevent the abdominal pain.

Not Coincidences

My surgery happened on June 12, the Independence Day of the country. This is also a celebration of “freedom” from the pain I have long endured. The procedure started at 3 PM which is also the same hour stated in the Bible that Christ died on the cross. Christ died so I can live. Live for him. And I believe He will sustain me until the very end.

Realizations: A New Chapter

I was eager to go back to work after two weeks because I am not used to being unproductive. However, I was not allowed by the company and they’d rather let me finish my medical leave to ensure that I am fully recovered. It made me realize that no matter how much I wanted to control my timeline and pacing in my hands, I needed to heal first. I’ve been working hard non-stop the past few years that I was unaware it took a huge toll on my physical and mental health already. When I am in the momentum in finishing my tasks at work, I refuse to stop. I have been thinking a lot since it’s part of my job. I am reminded to pause, to wait, and to let things take its full course.

Despite the challenges and the rollercoaster of emotions, I had so many blessings and answered prayers. Aside from the successful operation, the biopsy result ruled out that the tumors are not cancerous. Another thing is the approval of my women’s special leave to allow me to rest and recuperate fully. Simple gestures from family and friends like assisting me with tasks I cannot do, or sending me food meant a lot to me. I cannot elaborate further due to personal reasons, but my heart is truly grateful.

This whole process has never been easy, but I just feel like it’s my rebirth. I am a new person after all. I am still crawling my way towards healing, and it’s not just about the healing of the wound, it’s my heart, my soul, my entire being — who is rediscovering her purpose after everything that has happened.

Every single day, I am grateful that I am still alive and I was able to survive those grueling hours in the operating room. In the mundane things like sipping my coffee early in the morning, writing in my journal, and sleeping comfortably in my bed, my heart is overflowing with gratitude and thanksgiving.

Also, this surgery paved the way for me to revive my blog. Hopefully, I would be able to write again more frequently.

Thanks for reading until the end! Thanks be to God, and to Him be the glory!